Things You Do When Pregnant

I don't know what YOU do when YOU'RE pregnant but I have done some ridiculous things. One day I ate only orange colored and flavored things. This makes no sense to me because I don't really like orange anything but behold...what baby wants, baby gets. The most bizarre craving I had that day was McDonald's orange Hi-C. I know. Gross. And I had it twice. Double ick.

Okay, this still looks delicious to me. Nutrition fail. The good news is I stopped smoking meth so I feel like orange Hi-C vices pale in comparison.

Another day I impulse purchased outrageously expensive jeans (this is old news for you if you read all three of my previous posts) only to find them falling off of my butt. No one told my butt it's pregnant yet, which is nice in some ways, but it means I look like I swallowed a kickball. If I were a popsicle stick.

Yesterday I did something pretty absurd. In the winter I can never really get warm. I go from arctic tundra to popsicle but I never fully dethaw. Until April. I suppose it's the southern belle in me who is currently residing in the Peppermint Forest from Candy Land. Brrr! Why then, would I crave frozen yogurt? IT HAS THE WORD FROZEN IN IT.

For those of you following along at home, I just made two references to popsicles. My creativity is receding. Can it even do that? I know creativity is not a hairline. I am getting off topic. 

Here's where things get dumb. I walked to the yogurt place and dragged my co-workers because it's down the street from our office. I was cold before I even stepped outside. I remained cold on the walk over. I was shivering inside of the shop and didn't remove my coat nor did I take off my scarf. I ate frozen yogurt while donning my coat and scarf and shivering. Did I mention it was 35 degrees outside? 35 little lonely degrees.

These are things that make no sense to me. I was miserably cold the rest of the day and I would do it all over again. What's your "seriously?!" moment? I need to feel like I'm not the only weirdo subjecting myself to torture by fro-yo.