Are you there God? It's me, Jaimie.

Getting pregnant in New York (now we live in New Jersey but it's in Jersey City which is totally the 6th borough because Wikipedia says so) means I am surrounded by incredible, fantastic, brilliant people who have chosen to reproduce much later in their lives than what is more commonplace in other regions of the US. It *might* be because New Yorkers (in general) are Peter Pan commitment-phobes but what do I know? I'm new here.

What I'm trying to say is I am an island. Virtually zero of my friends in the northeast have babies and so I'm stuck to wonder why I've become incredibly itchy in the second trimester by myself. After suspecting the dreaded bed bugs and washed everything I own, I decided to join a MeetUp group called Jersey City Moms because I needed people. I needed mothers to reassure me that these things are normal (or tell me that I am a weirdo) - I just needed guidance. *Shout out to my girlfriends in TX, NC, MD, CA, and FL because y'all have been my saviors.*

Last week I had my first JC Moms outing. I met with three other women at this quaint Italian restaurant and within five minutes I was firing questions faster than the professors did during my dissertation defense. At complete strangers. It was amazing. I am certain they think I am insane.

• Tell me what surprised you most about labor.
• How hard is breastfeeding? Follow up question: There is nipple cream??
• When it is reasonable to travel an hour and half to Harlem to teach my graduate school class after giving birth?
• How has your relationship changed with your partner?
• When did your child sleep through the night?
• Why can't your belly deflate like a basketball after a baby is no longer there?
• WHAT DO YOU MEAN PEOPLE EAT THEIR OWN PLACENTA?

Guys, it was ridiculous. It felt like sixth grade health class and I knew as much about all of this stuff going in as I did in sixth grade so it kind of worked out. I am super grateful to these ladies for totally spilling it to me (also a complete stranger). I think I even made a friend coming out of the day!

I'm now aware of this mommy bond that exists when you lose all dignity with your feet up in stirrups for 12+ hours and you become more of a vessel than a lady and things come out of you that seem to serve no purpose other than mortification. PS-I YouTubed a live birth last night. DO NOT DO THAT. Ever.

Also, in other news, Josie KICKED and won't stop! It is half scary, half amazing, and 100% anxiety relieving. I guess "ask and you shall receive" works. In that case... 

Josie, please be born healthy and with a trust fund.